I saw the BIGGEST cockroach ever!

I'm telling you guys, this had to be some kind of mutated roach that escaped from some lab where the US gubment planned on breeding these monsters to fight wars for us.

This bug was amazingly huge and really didn't seem to be afraid of me when I entered the room. But now that I think about it, why should it have been? It damn near weighed the same as me.


I was so effin' grossed out. When I first saw it, I was kinda startled. I didn't expect to see a bug, let alone a freak of nature like this in the faculty/ staff lounge at my workplace. WE EAT IN THERE YALL!!! I never would have dreamed that I would see any critters in that place. It's kept pretty clean.

My heart was racing at this point. I was alone with a predator. I went immediately into survival mode, it was either kill or be killed, and I'll be a monkey's uncle if I were to be murdered by a bug.

I squished it.

Well, it was more of a crunch rather than a squish.

And it chewed through my shoe.

LMAO!

No it didn't.

I left its trembling carcass in the middle of the floor for all to see. And ran out of the room.
I returned a short while later to the scene of the crime. I left my Pepsi in there and I was extremely thirsty. I entered the room slowly, just in case the roaches cousins and dem was waiting to jump me when I came back. Luckily, I wasn't attacked.

But guess what?!?!

The roach wasn't there anymore!

I think it crawled away. It did the "I'm gonna make him think I'm dead" trick on me. I thought I stomped it dead. I guess I didn't grind it into the floor enough.

So now, whenever I go back into that room, I am extra cautious. I know that roach is nursing itself back to health and as soon as it's at 100% it's coming back. This isn't over by any means, but I'm ready. I never run away from a fight.



Bring it bitch!